


A Spell That Cannot Be Undone

by TheLastWitch



Series: The Arcana Game Characters x Reader collections [2]
Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Eventual Relationships, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Jealousy, Memory Loss, Mystery, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-05-16 01:42:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14801958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLastWitch/pseuds/TheLastWitch
Summary: You're drowning in a lake of uncertainty, but it's relieving to know that you're not alone.





	1. Welcome Back

**Author's Note:**

> I know that Asra is canonically non-binary, but I'll use he/him pronouns.
> 
> **WARNING : This fic is a mix of canon and non-canon stuffs. Also, I kind of add up my theories here. So, if you don't want to see spoilers or deal with speculations, don't read!!**  
>  Note : Your thoughts are written in italic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You've got too much on your plate,
> 
> Asra is more than willing to listen.

A short while after the incident where Julian turned himself in, you were invited by the Countess to a meeting. Every palace courtiers were also invited to discuss about the fugitive who's finally been caught. You were glad that you got the opportunity to clear misunderstandings, but the fact that Julian lied regarding Lucio's murder left you confused. You didn't know what it is that he's plotting and you'd hate to ruin it, if it was a good one.

After living in the palace for sometime, you concluded that almost every members from the courtiers were airheads. The only problem lies within Consul Valerius and Quaestor Valdemar, that is, if they are on the opposing team. Valerius was the most sensible one, whereas you could never guess what Valdemar was thinking, since the plague was over a long time ago. Since the Countess trusted you, you knew that she'd see eye to eye. After all, she had also seen Lucio's goat form, which means she knew that Lucio had gained some kind of power involving magic and a murder was unlikely.

When everyone had arrived, you suddenly remembered that one time when Volta and Vulgora asked for card reading, you found out that they weren't humans. Your instinct told you that Valdemar and Vlastomil were most probably not humans too. Though they were harmless and didn't do anything suspicious at the moment, you'd still keep your guards up when they were around.

"Is a trial really necessary?" Valerius conveyed his opinion, "The result is obvious, Dr. Devorak is guilty. That's all there is to it."

"I agree with Consul Valerius, I'd rather spend some time with my worms than assisting a pointless trial!" Vlastomil frowned, pulling his own hair in frustration.

"I don't think trial is a bad decision," Valdemar stated calmly with a grin on their face, "I'm quite interested to hear what Doctor No. 069 has to say."

"It's been a long time since we have a trial by combat!" Vulgora clenched their fists and shouted, "A battle of power where the stronger one crushes the other!"

"If we get to eat some delicious snacks during the trial, then it'd better be held!" Volta clapped her hands enthusiastically.

"IT'S A BATTLEFIELD, YOU DOLT," Vulgora slammed their hands on the table, creating a huge shake, "NOT A FRIGGIN' BUFFET!!"

"Enough! Trial or not, violence is not the right thing to resort to. We'll take a short break." Nadia requested while glaring at the courtiers, "Portia, please get my beloved guests something to drink."

"Certainly, M'lady." Portia hurriedly left the hall to run her errand.

You felt this uneasy feeling when you noticed that Valerius had been keeping an eye on you, his eyes never left your figure. You had probably ticked him off at some point, but you had no idea why.

Luckily, Portia quickly returned with the drinks everyone requested. You sighed as tension felt a little bit lighter, just a bit lighter.

"Thank you." You gratefully accepted a big mug of your favorite coffee from Portia before returning your focus on the meeting, "Your Highness, about the Count's murderer, I believe that unusual magic was involved. Julian, who has no magic at all, would never be able to do that. Therefore, I'd  like to request a legal trial."

The Countess nodded after hearing your opinion, "I agree with--"

"Oh? And here I thought the doctor himself has admitted his own doing," Valerius cut Nadia off, twirling his wine glass lazily, "There's nobody to defend him anyway."

"I'll prove that he isn't guilty." You rebuked firmly, refusing to keep up with this shit anymore.

"What?" Valerius raised one of his eyebrows, looking unamused.

The Countess cleared her throat and placed a hand on yours in reassurance, "I think it's pretty clear, Consul Valerius. We're going to hold a trial for Dr. Devorak in two days time. Anyone who objects this decision may raise their hands."

Her declaration rendered everyone in the hall speechless. Nobody dared to raise their hands, not even the bravest warmonger Vulgora.

"People of Vesuvia will be the ones to judge." The Countess placed her empty tea cup on the tray Portia brought, "Even if Dr. Devorak pleaded guilty, if the crowd surmised that he was innocent, he should be freed from any charges."

Having nothing else to discuss about, the decision was soon settled and the meeting was dismissed.

Hoping to avoid any interactions with any of the courtiers, you intended to go straight to your room. However, your movements were halted once you felt a tap on your shoulder.

To your dismay, it was Consul Valerius.

His face was inscrutable, but there was a hint of coldness in his voice, "Can we talk for a bit?"

 

He took you into a room with dim light that seemed to be an old guest quarter. He closed the door behind him before returning to face you with a frown on his face.

"I have nothing to say to you." Your eyes rested and arms folded, trying to keep your emotions to yourself.

"Well, I do," He asserted, taking a step closer to you, "I see that you have a way with words, Witch. But you'd better use it for something else."

You rolled your eyes, _Witch? Oh well, this guy lacks knowledge._

"What are you insinuating?" You didn't want to waste any more time, so you asked him to give it to you straight.

"I'm telling you not to get in my way," Valerius grabbed your chin, his face was a few centimeters away, "Why did you seek a trial and complicate things?"

"Let's see, you've always had that wine glass with you," You gave him a calm response that'd definitely irritate him, "People tend to fall into false judgement when they're drunk, do they not?"

Unexpected to him, you yanked his collars and brought him even closer to you, catching him off guard.

"Unlike you, I don't bask in the reflected glory of someone else." You leaned forward to whisper in his ear, "What did you exactly do to secure your position? Lick his boots?"

Just when you were about to retreat from your position, he caught your wrists, looking very irritated, "You sure know how to tick people off, insolent witch. It's not necessarily a bad trait to have, but I'd watch it if I were you.."

You pulled your hands away quite easily, it was quite a sloppy grip, to be honest.

"I suppose consuls always give the best advice." You almost laughed at your own sarcasm, but you pulled off a deadpan face, "I apologize for my prior misconduct. Now, if you'll excuse me."

"Wait, I'm not done with you yet." He yanked a piece of your clothing, forcing you to stop in your tracks, you didn't want it to be torn.

You gritted your teeth in vexation, he wasted your time more than he should. Maybe you should use some magic?

 

All of sudden, the door was opened with a bang. You turned your head, your eyes met a pair of purple ones, Asra had come for you.

"(Y/N)!" He shouted as you ran into his arms, "Are you okay?"

"Yes," You sighed as you felt his scent embraced you, "Thanks for finding me."

Asra gently stroked your hair before glancing at the man behind you, "Consul Valerius, I believe your business here is done?"

His tone indicated that it was more a statement, rather than a question. For a calm face, his aura is menacing.

Feeling threatened, Valerius clicked his tongue and quickly escaped the scene.

 

"It's fine now." He resumed to pat your head, you could sense a hint of regret in his voice, "I shouldn't have left you alone in this palace."

"I don't need you to babysit me." You took a step back to take a proper look at his soothing smile, "Anyway, how did you find me?"

"I have just arrived at the palace not too long ago. Right after greeting the countess, I met Onofrio. He took me here." Asra crouched and petted your familiar's head, it was a 3-year-old black tiffany, "He seemed really worried about you."

 _"Thanks to me!"_ Onofrio tried to reach you with his hands.

"Aww, did you really? You handsome boy." You took Onofrio in your arms and nuzzled his cute nose.

He purred and leaned against you, looking really proud and content. Your cat has a pair of beautiful heterochromia eyes. They were amber and clear blue which was quite unusual for a black cat, much less for his breed.

"Oh, that's right. Where's Faust?" You carried your cat and started to look around, she was nowhere to be found.

"I heard the news. So I told her to check on Julian, she'll be back in the evening." Asra seems a bit grim whenever he talks about Julian, "Who knows what he's up to this time."

You impulsively grabbed his arm, "Do you want to come to my room?"

He looked a bit surprised at first, but his usual calm demeanor returned in a blink of an eye. He must've misunderstood the situation for a second there.

"Sure."

 

When the two of you finally reached at your chamber, you wasted no time in closing the door. Looking around, you breathed a sigh of relief as you confirmed that Lucio's ghost wasn't flying around. You didn't even bother to turn on the light, it was pretty bright outside anyway. You put Onofrio down and smiled as you saw him rest comfortably on his luxurious cat bed which Nadia provided since your arrival.

"So, what is it that has been bothering you?" Asra could read you like an open book, you couldn't hide anything from him, except for one thing.

You did want to talk and exchange opinions, but that wasn't the main reason. You didn't want him to stop talking. It's only been a week, but you've missed his voice more than anything. You've always harbored strong feelings towards him. Regarding his, you couldn't tell at all, he has been obscure about it.

"I have a lot on my mind," You sat on the corner of your bed, "Previously, Julian told me that he didn't kill Lucio. Then, he went into the dungeon where he used to work, seeking for answers... I don't understand why he revealed himself in front of Nadia and pleaded guilty."

"... Why do you care about him so much?" Asra sat beside you, looking somewhat troubled, "There's no need for you to involve yourself with him, actually."

"I-The Countess gave me this necklace as a gift, she has faith in me." You touched the glimmering emerald necklace that dangled beneath your neck, "No matter what, I'm going to present her the truth."

Asra broke into a smile as he heard your response, "You're as willful as ever."

You didn't know why but the air felt somehow nostalgic. Leaning your head against his right shoulder, you felt him tensed a little before relaxing to your presence.

"The cards told me that Procurator Volta and Pontifex Vulgora are not humans. The worst possible case is the whole palace courtiers aren't." You continued to share him your thoughts, "It's not just the cards. I couldn't quite place it, but I could feel something ominous coming from them."

"I've always known there's something more to them than meets the eye," Asra's expression turned pensive, "They do have some strange abilities, something inhuman. The cards were right, but we need a concrete evidence to prove that."

"... Do you remember that time in the Northeast? When we helped Saguaro and the townsfolk get their spring back?" Closing your eyes, you started to recall your recent journey with Asra, "The red beetles. All of the courtiers have the same red beetle brooches. Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but it has been bugging me... Are they by any chance, related to those beetles that caused drought?"

"We cannot rule out that possibility. I also think it's pretty safe to assume that they took part in the magical ritual during masquerade... Which helped Lucio transform into the devil." Asra spoke as if he was telling a sinister tale, "As far as we know, he's still trapped between realms. He's still in incomplete state or so he says."

You abruptly pulled away as you realized something, startling the man beside you, "Do you think the next Masquerade will--"

_Knock Knock_

"Excuse me, dear Magicians!" You heard a familiar bright voice from outside, "M'lady generously offered you to use her private bath."

Before you could think, Asra stood up and extended his hand to you, "Shall we?"

You were absent-minded, staring at Portia for a moment before you blushed furiously, _Wait, what?!_

Even though Asra is like a family member to you, the idea of bathing together is just too much. You couldn't possibly stay calm in that kind of situation.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Where are my manners," He averted his eyes, trying to ignore the fact that he was slightly pink to his ears, "Do you want to bathe separately? I'll tell Port--"

You grabbed his retreating hand instinctively, "I don't mind."

"You don't mind?" Your words left him flabbergasted, it made you even more self-conscious.

You glanced away and let his hand go, "Err, I mean- It's just a bath, right?"

"Yeah, it is." He broke into a relaxed smile before offering his hand once again, it somehow felt like he was teasing you, "Let's not make her wait."

"Okay." You took it hesitantly, still too shy to stare into his eyes.

You've almost forgotten this feeling. His hand was indeed warm and calming, though his grip was unexpectedly firm this time. Despite knowing it's impossible, you wished that he'd never let go of your hand, ever.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried my best to imagine what Asra's thoughts would've been in several situations since I couldn't fully understand his personality... He's whimsical and hard to read, I guess? >.< Anyway thanks for reading!


	2. Starting A New Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Losing your memories has taken a toll on you.
> 
> Will you find out the truth?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, the apprentice will learn some of her past from Asra aye <3  
> Lots of steamy and fluffy stuffs beware! :3

The second you opened the door, Portia flashed a smile, there are a bag of cat food and a glass of water in her hands, "The Countess' private bath is at the end of this hall to the right! I can feed your cat while you're taking a bath. He must be hungry."

"Oh, right. Thanks a lot, Portia." You let Portia entered the room and put some into Onofrio's bowl.

"Uhh, what's his name again?" She rubbed her chin, trying to remember, "Onfrappe?"

"Onofrio." You corrected before proceeding to walk with Asra.

 

The bath was indeed as luxurious as you thought it'd be. You and Asra changed into the robe provided while facing the opposite direction, you were still kind of anxious, but it's still relieving to know that Asra was the kind of person who won't break his promise.

_He wouldn't peek._

You reassured yourself and went inside after you were done and he followed after. You took a glass bottle filled with purple liquid on your left which was supposed to be shampoo. It had a soft lavender smell which helped you relax. You poured some water from the pot to wet your hair and started washing it. You were trying to busy yourself, so that you wouldn't have any time to get embarrassed by Asra's presence. He probably did the same thing as you were doing.

"So, what did you talk about back then?"

"Um, what?"

"With Consul Valerius."

You felt a twinge of discomfort as you heard his name, "Oh, him. Nothing important."

He came closer to your figure, looking a bit distressed, "I may not look like it, (Y/N). But I was really irritated back then."

"... At what?" You raised one of your eyebrows.

"I don't like it when you're alone with any other guy," He was now an inch from your position, his fingers gently caressed your cheek, "Especially, dangerous ones like him."

_Is he... Jealous?_

_No, it's not possible_. You mentally slapped yourself.

Asra has always considered you as a part of his family, as his sole apprentice, so it was probably just your imagination. 

"You don't have to worry." You broke his gaze as you felt the heat rose to your cheeks again, "I'm an adult, I can take care of myself."

He cornered you with his long arms, a sly smirk adorned his face, "Can you really?"

Is he teasing you? You couldn't tell since he's always hard to read.

It's hard to concentrate when he was this close, close enough to feel his breath on your face. His beautifully toned physique could be seen clearly through the transparent robe and those succulent lips made you shiver a little, it was really tempting. Truth be told, you'd like to feel his soft tanned skin on yours and bury yourself in his scent right now. However, you've always imagined that if you did so, he could suddenly disappear into thin air and left you alone. You couldn't imagine Asra as the type who clings onto someone; not like you're that type of person either.

"Could you stop teasing me?" You tried your best to not to stutter, "Please?"

Seeing his wide-eyed reaction, you should be very red by now.

Nevertheless, instead of giving you some space, he embraced you tightly in his arms. You instantly felt really hot as you felt his chest pressed against yours, thin silky fabrics are the only ones who blocked the direct contact.

"You're very cute," He mumbled quietly, it was really faint but you couldn't miss it, "Gosh, it's hard to control myself."

His words made your heart jump. _Does he by any chance...?_

"Asra?" You braved yourself to look into his eyes, "What do you mean by--"

You gasped as you felt his lips on the crook of your neck. He gently left trail of kisses along it and to your collarbone, drawing a whimper out of you. You lightly pushed him back to ease the intensity.

"Ngh," You tried to muffle your pleasure and calm down since your heart was racing erratically, "A-Asra, what are you doing?"

He almost immediately stopped, took your chin and pressed a lingering kiss on your lips, "Do you not like it?"

"You-- Well, I like it..." You could hardly believe that Asra had something for you, he definitely caught you off guard, "It's just... Too sudden."

He broke into a satisfied smile as he heard your answer. You felt your heart melted as you saw the stars in his eyes, you just couldn't win.

This time he kissed you more passionately, trying to savor the taste of your lips even though it was threatening to break. When you were finally able to break the kiss and pursed your lips, he gave them a few licks before retreating. You didn't know he was such a good kisser, it lingered even after they parted.

"I love you, (Y/N). I've always observed you from afar and by the time I noticed, I was in too deep." He gently tucked strands of damp hair behind your ear, "Everything went great when I realized that it was mutual, but something happened and you slept for three years. Then you woke up and treat me like a stranger, much to my shock."

"So you're saying... We were lovers to begin with?" Your voice cracked a bit, you couldn't hide your surprise and guilt.

Then it felt like everything falls into place. Your name which is permanently carved deep into the bark of the willow by Asra's magic, the pieces of memories that Faust led you to and the thump of your heartbeat you've always had whenever Asra was close. It all made sense, you two definitely had a history together. He's been longing for you for three whole years. You couldn't imagine how lonely it must be, you were so close, yet he couldn't even touch you. He was waiting for your memory to come back, but it never did.

"Yes," He took your hands in his, "I intended to tell you sooner, but then I began to doubt myself whether I'm good enough for you, I couldn't protect you that time."

_That time...?_

You were about to ask him about it, but you winced as you felt a familiar stinging pain in your head.

"(Y/N)! Are you okay?" He frantically cupped your cheek and tried to locate the pain source, "Is it the headache?"

"... I'm fine." You tried to convince him with a smile, "It's nothing."

He frowned at your answer, he couldn't believe that you gave him a flat-out lie.

But he didn't want to argue right now, so he kept it to himself, "Maybe we stayed inside for too long, let's dry up and rest."

"You're probably right." You meekly nodded and proceeded to rise up from the bath.

Asra's face turned several shades darker as he watched your soaked figure left the pool. Water drizzled lavishly from your chin to your thighs. He could clearly see everything through that wet transparent robe and he tried to contain himself. You were not feeling well and his mind shouldn't roam somewhere else at the moment. He shouldn't be imagining how you'd look as he took your beautiful form, wet and warm.

"Asra?" your voice snapped him out of it, you're now changing into a silk nightgown, "What are you waiting for?"

"Oh, sorry," He rose from his position, "I was out of it for a second."

Instinctively, you faced the other way, saving him from embarrassment, or so you thought. When you took a peek to see if he was done, he didn't look the least bit bothered by it, actually.

 

Right after cleaning yourselves up, a servant guided you to the dining hall to have dinner with the countess. You were relieved that no courtiers were present, at least you wanted to have a peaceful time eating.

"Thank you for joining me, dear Magicians." Nadia smiled as you two took a seat.

"It's an honor, Countess." Asra and you replied, almost at the same time.

"I see that you two were really close," She looked delighted, "Oh, right. Would you mind telling me about your last journey?"

"Of course." Asra nodded and shared his travelling experience while you eat.

He talked about a rogue he met on the way, who instead of doing his usual nasty job, was tricked by Asra. He also told an old folktale from a certain village, which involved sorcery in a desolated plain. His stories were hard to miss, they were all very interesting and mysterious. However as always, he liked being ambiguous and didn't leak too much information. He tended to leave rooms for people to imagine the rest for themselves or see them in real life. He has always respect those who had curious and adventurous qualities in them.

"You've never ceased to amuse me, magicians." Nadia gave a sincere comment before dismissing you, "Portia, please take my beloved guests to their chambers, they'll need plenty of rest for tomorrow's affair."

"Of course, M'lady." Portia smiled kindly and started walking, the two of you followed behind.

 

After you reached your destination, you stopped a second and turned around, "Good night, Portia."

"Sleep tight, (Y/N)." Portia smiled, then giving Asra a weird look as he was about to enter the room with you, "What are you doing, Asra? Your room is next to hers."

"I'm not staying with (Y/N)?" Asra looked kind of surprised, then he stared at you for a long time, probably waiting for your reaction.

"It's not like we usually sleep in the same room back then?" It was rather a confirmation than a statement.

"But I'd like to." He expressed briefly.

Your blushed at his bold statement, "W-Well, I think I can relate... It's kinda lonely to sleep in a large room by yourself."

You didn't know if he was teasing you or not, but you'd certainly like to sleep in his warm arms.

"Great, then it's settled." Asra looked satisfied at your answer.

Portia faked a cough and smirked, "If you're more comfortable with sharing a room, go ahead. But, make sure to keep your voices down... While chatting."

 _Ugh, Portia is also a tease_. 

You knew that the heat in your face wouldn't go away anytime soon and Asra just laughed it off.

"Anyway, I hope your investigation goes well," Portia stated sincerely as she held your hands, "Ilya is the only family I have left."

"I couldn't fully guarantee his safety, but whatever he's trying to do, I'll find out and let you know," You reassured her with a smile, "I promise."

Portia gave you a friendly hug before she left. She seemed content, even though you couldn't actually do anything significant for her. It made you a bit ashamed and unsettled, but you tried to ignore them. You shouldn't dwell in those kind of feelings, or rather you shouldn't make _him_ worry.

 

As you got in, you found Faust slithering across the bed. Onofrio was chasing her like always, he seemed like he wanted to play with her.

 _"Tired!"_ Faust voice rang inside my ear.

You quickly took Onofrio away from her and scolded him, "Onofrio, you're tiring her out! Just stay on your bed, ok?"

 _"But it's fun."_ The black cat gave you a smug grin instead.

If weren't for his cuteness, that grin would remind you of a certain someone that brought you all these troubles. Putting that aside, his personality was a serious concern and you needed to fix that, he's too haughty for a cat.

"If you keep on bothering Faust, I'm going to desert you." You put him on his bed gently, he was too shocked and didn't dare to move an inch.

"Faust, how's Ilya?" Asra asked as he let her squeezed his arm.

Faust tilted her head, _"Stupid!"_

You almost laughed at that.

"I'm not talking about how he usually is, Faust," Asra spoke to Faust like he was a proud parent, "Did he talk to himself? After all, that's the only thing he's good at."

_Wow, he insulted Julian wholeheartedly. Some kind of relationship there._

Asra closed his eyes and used some magic to probe her memories. While he were doing so, you couldn't help but notice his long white lashes, they made him look exceptionally beautiful; well he IS beautiful.

You waited patiently until he opened his eyes and asked, "What did you see?"

"He spoke to a guard and told him some old cranky stories." Asra shrugged before walking towards the bed, "That's all."

"Every time I think I understand him," You followed him with a frown on your face, "He always makes me take that back."

 

All of sudden, Asra pulled you towards the bed and made you fall on top of him, "You don't have to understand him to know the truth."

Being so close to each other, the smell of lavender shampoo filled your nose, "I know. It's just..."

You couldn't finish your sentence and rolled over to lay beside him instead.

He stole your hands and started kissing your fingertips, "Stop thinking about him. I'm right here."

You couldn't stop the urge to hug him and he chuckled in return.

He was right. Asra was; or rather is your lover. He deserved more than your attention.

"Sometimes your mind wandered over the things you can't reach." You confessed quietly as you felt his warmth embraced you, "Just like when you were gone."

"I wouldn't go to a place you can't reach..." Asra's hand gently petted your head, "Not again."

The second you raised your head to look at him, he seized your lips and dissolved all your doubts.

When the kiss was broken, you poked his nose with your finger, "I'll hold you onto that."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did write that Asra is a good kisser... But Faust is still the best kisser!!  
> I hope u enjoy it anddd see you next update!^^


	3. What Lies Ahead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You were investigating for the sake of truth
> 
> But it turns out that you were missing a big part of yourself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yess, another chapter is finally here...  
> It's mostly about investigating tbh, the trial was actually very short and full of bs.  
> But hey, I tried my best writing this anyway so enjoy! :)

The sounds of birds woke you up from your slumber. You slowly opened your eyes, tracing the bed beside you to find nobody. You woke up the second you found out that Asra was long gone, but then you quickly retreated back to bed as you felt a familiar headache hit you.

You heard the door creaked and light footsteps that were too recognizable, he was back.

"(Y/N)? Are you awake?" Asra walked towards you and sat on the corner of the bed.

"Yeah," You smiled as you felt the nice smell of cinnamon filled the room, "The sheets were cold. How long have you been away?"

He was a bit surprised hearing such cute words from you early in the morning, "Well, around an hour ago. Why did you ask? Miss me already?"

"Maybe." You got up from your position to sit more carefully this time.

"Here," Asra handed you a cup of Cinnamon tea, "It'll help your headaches a bit."

"Thank you." You took a sip, the taste of honey filled your mouth, "It's delicious. But I still think the tea you brought from the north is the best."

Asra's eyes went wide the second he heard your statement.

"You used to say that too," Asra petted Faust who was resting in his lap, "Anytime I made you drinks other than that, you'd say that."

"Hehe, did I?" You saw your own reflection on the tea he made, thinking how much you must've changed after you lost your memories, but he still loved you the same.

_Come to think of it... How far have we gone as lovers? Did we..._

"You looked like you've got some questions in your head, mind telling me?" Asra took your chin in his fingers, it made you more embarrassed.

 _"Question!"_ Faust tilted her head to the side briskly.

"I-I was just wondering how long I have known you." You quickly answered so that they wouldn't get any ideas.

You couldn't read Asra's expression. It seemed that he was probably bewildered since you've never actually asked him that before. More like you didn't have the courage to, because the pain that always haunt you whenever you have questions about the past.

"Are you curious?" Asra shifted to his teasing smile which always makes you tingle with excitement.

"Yes," You urged him to talk about the past even though it wasn't your first intention, "I want to know."

"... I've known you since nine years ago," Asra started reminiscing and the facts made you surprised, "We met at the masquerade and I was selling... Y'know, stuffs."

"I'm starting to believe that you know me a lot more than I do." You gave a small laugh before proceeding to hear him out.

"The encounter was very short and it was certainly not love at first sight." Asra lovingly caressed your ear, his smile was very gentle, "But once we parted, it felt so wrong."

Your narrowed your eyes while welcoming your familiar onto your lap too, "... That's cheesy."

 _"Heheh, cheesy boy."_ You could hear Onofrio snickered at Asra's explanation.

"Hey, you made me say it!" Asra pouted and laid down on the bed.

"Touché." You commented briefly and sipped your warm tea.

"We weren't exactly close at that time and even the years after, but it didn't keep me from wanting to see you." Asra immediately stood up, he walked towards the source of light and opened the window to air the room, "I deliberately made too much items, just to afford seconds longer with you."

You were at lost of words. You effectively averted your eyes in order to save yourself from embarrassment since he was too sweet.

"Are you okay, (Y/N)?" Asra placed his slender hand on your head, checking your temperature.

"Y-Yeah, I'm just a lil bit hungry." You admitted when you felt your stomach growls.

Asra chuckled and offered his hand, "Let's go then."

 

 

Right after a luxurious breakfast with Nadia, you decided to start your investigation immediately. You couldn't waste more time as the trial will be held tomorrow. Walking through the hallway with Asra, you tried to find the way to the dungeon which used to be Julian's old workplace, specified by the countess. Faust and Onofrio kept an eye on the palace surroundings, they'd have to report if anything strange happened.

"Princess Navra!" You quickly recognized the cheery voice you've come to know until just recently.

"Oh dear, how are you?" The orange-haired princess' eyes were gleaming and she reached for your hands as soon she saw you, "I've heard from Nadia that you were busy investigating."

"Um, yes. Actually, I'm planning to do so right now." You tried to back away and retrieve your personal space, Asra couldn't help but chuckle at your squirming figure.

The princess quickly turned her gaze to Asra because he caught her attention, "Are you by any chance, Asra the magician??"

"It's nice to meet you, Princess aa- Navra." Asra nodded slightly to greet her.

"As I thought, you've got an amazing aura." The princess looked incredibly amused, but then turned contemplative, "Oh, I'd hate to disturb you during your inquiry. Let's have some tea together next time."

"Of course." You replied and watched her disappear into another room.

 

As both of you walked further, your path became more and more eerie, the feeling of uneasiness overwhelmed you. But you felt calmer because Asra is with you, he's with you now.

"I see that you made a lot of friends since you've got here, (Y/N)," Asra patted your shoulder, a small smile decorated his adorable feature, "You used to be more... Skeptical."

You put your hand on top of his, "Believe me or not, I've still had my doubts. Since my memory couldn't stretch more than 3 years ago, I had no choice but to become wary of everything, including myself."

You recalled how your neighbors looked at you suspiciously like you were a shady witch that'd ask for human's liver to compensate some questionable potion or something.

His hand went to cup your cheek, while his face moved closer to plant a feather-light kiss on your forehead, "You don't need to worry about that."

"Right," You embraced him and inhaled deeply, "Out of all people, you're the one I can fully trust."

You were surprised to see Asra's expression. Instead of his usual bright self, he looked rather conflicted. "... I might be not as reliable as you think. It's best to follow your own heart."

You knew deep down that he's humble, but he's never said something like that before.

You backed away, the color of doubts filled your eyes, "Did you hide something from me?"

_Tell me. Tell me that you hide nothing._

"... Did I hide something? If it was possible, I  **wanted** to hide nothing." Asra's words were like feathers, even a feather has its sharp end and it stabbed you like a quill pen; it made you more shocked than hurt, "Rather than that, I prefer to keep you safe. Some answers are better left unsaid."

"Why-" You stopped before you could ask him, because you knew even he wouldn't answer you for whatever the reason was, "I'll go down myself."

"(Y/N), it could be dangerous-" Asra tried to warn you, he was genuinely worried.

"It's fine." You reassured him, "I'll be back soon."

Asra helplessly watched your figure disappear from his sight. Honestly, you weren't trying to avoid him, you were just trying to sort out your feelings. You didn't know that your beloved was hiding something from you, but you also knew that there must be a good reason behind it. Because... He'd never intentionally hurt you.

 

When you finally arrived at the dungeon, you walked carefully through the dim corridor. Even without magic, you could feel a pair of eyes stalking you. It was quite to your dismay, finding that you weren't alone in this ominous part of the palace.

You turned around and saw a tall figure in white. As they moved closer, it became clear that it was none other than Quaestor Valdemar.

"... Quaestor Valdemar, isn't it?" You stared at them with cautiousness and slight threat.

"Hmm, I've never had a visitor in ages." Valdemar grinned creepily and opened their arms wide like they were about to catch you.

Fortunately, it turned out to be a welcoming gesture.

"I'm quite interested in your work here during the plague, Quaestor. I hope I wasn't too intrusive." You tried your best not to stutter when you half-lied about being interested in their job.

"Of course not. Please be my guest." Valdemar walked past and led you into his working space.

They offered you a mask before entering for safety purpose whatsoever.

Even with the mask, the room smelt slightly putrid, but it was easily defeated with the strong smell of antiseptic.

"Quaestor, Are doctors required to wear those elaborated white outfit when they were working?"

"Yes, of course. We need to wear them in order to protect ourselves from any kind of infection." Valdemar cocked their head to the side, looking amused, "Though some of us still got infected regardless, they made interesting subjects."

You looked around, spotting a dissection table and other necessary equipment for doctors. Nothing seemed suspicious and you couldn't find anything related to Julian.

"Is there something you're looking for?" The creepy grin returned to their face.

It was natural that doctors had keen observation.

"I- Actually, I need to know what Dr. Devorak was researching." You decided to confess despite feeling wary, "He was with you during the plague, right?"

"Doctor #069, yes?" Valdemar looked like they had seen this coming, "Well, I didn't particularly pay attention to my colleagues, so I didn't know the details... But he usually dealt with leeches or so I heard. That used to be his working space."

You decided to open the door they indicated. It was really cramped and the table had books scattered on it. It almost seemed like somebody had come here earlier not too long ago. You observed some of the books which contains information about medicine and experiments. Julian's drawings and writings were painful to look at, so you didn't even bother reading too much and eventually found a strangely familiar log.

_Aren't these my writings?_

You flipped through the pages, it was definitely yours... Or used to be yours at least. But that means, it's either you've been here before, or Julian probably stole it from you. Even though the latter is less likely, this place doesn't ring a bell at all.

Stealthily, you kept the book with you for further observations. Hopefully, Quaestor Valdemar wouldn't notice that something's missing. You tried to find something else which might be suspicious, but to no avail. So without further ado, you bid farewell with the creepy quaestor and looked for Nadia. You needed her permission to talk with the insane fugitive, at least to meet her expectation as a good guest.

 

Along the way, you met Asra and decided to go together. It was surely a bit awkward after that little bicker with him earlier, but there is a more important business to attend to. You needed to question Julian about some things and you hoped he wouldn't try to avoid your questions or change the subject. Making your way to Nadia's chamber as Portia suggested, you were stopped before you could even knock the door.

Asra's hand had made its way to your arm. You turned to see him standing behind you with a worried expression on his face. You tried to avoid emotional conversation during your investigation, but it seems unavoidable at the moment.

"(Y/N), I- No. We'll talk later after we squeeze some answers out of him." Asra averted his eyes and let go of your arm.

But you couldn't wait any longer. You slipped your arms through the gaps between his body and his upper limbs and pulled him into your embrace. You could feel the erratic heartbeat and his welcoming warmth. Without thinking twice, Asra returned your hug with a stronger force, like he was desperately trying to keep you from fleeing and leaving him alone.

You knew that it wasn't the right time to say it, but it came out from your lips anyway, "I love you."

It startled him a bit, but he smiled and kissed the nape of your neck as you leaned on his chest, "Me too. I love you so very much that it hurts."

No more words needed to resolve any wariness or overwrought. Both of you felt safe and comfortable in each others' arms.

 

Right after getting the countess' approval, Asra and you paid Julian a visit and found him grinning instead of panicking. He was calmly sitting on the edge of his bed, reading a suspicious thick book which he quickly close and toss away afterwards. He didn't look sorry at all, for getting you and his little sister into trouble.

"You... You'd better explain everything before I explode." You didn't even bother to look calm or act like a good cop anymore.

You wanted to punch him in the face and wipe that annoying grin off his face.

Seeing no response from the guilty, Asra sighed and called him out, "There's no use tricking us or beating around the bush, Ilya. Why do you have my spell book?"

"Oh, well. It seems like I've been found out." Julian scratched his auburn hair and started confessing, "I just- I want to talk with the hanged man, okay? I knew that I've found a cure to the plague, but since my memories didn't come back anytime soon, I need to take extreme measures."

"Why is the cure so important now?" You raised one of your eyebrows, demanding him to explain more clearly.

"Because the red beetles are back. The plague would return once again." Julian looked extremely serious, there was no room for jokes at all.

Asra contemplated his argument and looked surprised after piecing them all together, "... You're attempting to die and returning to life?"

You eventually caught on to what Asra was saying, "Wait! Is there even a guarantee that you'll definitely return? I mean, getting your wounds healed and resurrection are completely different things, y'know?"

"I know. But it is worth the risk." Julian's smile returned once again, and he looked rather selfless.

After admitting everything, a short silence filled the room.

"Julian... I didn't know if it was the best option, but I hope you're correct." You squeezed your arm, trying to suppress all of your mixed feelings, "I... Really hope so."

Julian's eyebrows drooped but the smile never left his face, "Yeah, me too. I mean, if I really died, nobody'd learn the truth, right?"

"I knew that you've been suicidal and all, but you'd better come back." Asra stated his concern firmly.

As tiresome as he is, Julian's still an old friend to him, afterall.

"If I was allowed to choose, then I would." Julian retrieved Asra's spell book which he threw previously, "Alrighty, now give me some time alone since I'm trying my best to immerse myself in this curious magic world or whatever."

"Wait. I've still got some questions and I wouldn't leave before they were answered." You closed the book he was holding, eyeing him suspiciously.

"What?" Julian looked baffled, "What did I do?"

"Have we met before? During the plague?" You took out the log you hid and showed it to him, "Why was there a log with my writings inside your workspace in the dungeon?"

Julian looked lost in thought for a moment, then he snapped out of it.

He looked like he just remembered something very important, "... That's right! You were my apprentice back then. Alongside all the physician, we were searching for the cure of the plague... How did I forget something really important?"

"So that means, I used to work there as your apprentice?" You tried to clarify his statements before looking at Asra's expression.

He looked troubled, or rather dejected. It looked like a big secret had been revealed, but it made no sense to you at all. He must've known this fact all along.

"Neither of us remembered that." You clenched your fist and looked right into Asra's eyes, "I didn't want to doubt you, Asra, so tell me the truth. This isn't your doing, is it?"

"... No, I don't think I did." Asra hesitated a bit and he answered quite ambiguously, "At least, I don't remember doing it.:"

"I know that you've been dodging talking about my past for my sake, but I wish you'd eventually tell me yourself." Your whole body felt heavy and it got harder to hide the cracks in your voice, "I need my past to define me. Without it, I am but a tree without roots."

"(Y/N)..." Asra tried his best to calm you down, "Like you said, I'd tell you eventually. We'll go wherever you wanna go after the trial."

He looked somewhat in pain when he spoke and you didn't want to see him like that.

"Okay." You quickly bury your thoughts and tried to recover, "Let's leave for now."

"Yeah." Asra agreed as he opened the door, "I suppose he needs to enjoy his rest where he can wake up from before getting another one that might end up forever."

"Hey, I can hear that." Julian crossed his arms, "... Aand that sounds quite sinister, to be honest. Well, not like it didn't suit someone as nefarious as me."

You giggled at his remarks before leaving with Asra.

 

You tried to avoid thinking about the trouble related to your memories for the rest of the day and focus on the trial the next day. Now instead of clearing the doctor's name, you have to make sure that he is determined guilty. It was quite ironic, finding the truth didn't make you want to reveal it at all. The plan backfired, but it's not like it wasn't for the better good. Since it's best that both the countess and Portia know about this, you've got a lot of explaining to do.

That night was quiet and peaceful, Faust and Onofrio also returned without any problem. Even after learning the truth and was left in the dark all this time, you couldn't bring yourself to distrust Asra. He's still and he'll always be someone for you to come home to. His warmth is still the best feeling ever and you didn't want it to change.

"Good night, (Y.N)." He whispered and put out the candle light with his magic.

Once again, you fell asleep with his arms around you.

 

The day where you had to lie publicly has arrived. As expected, every palace courtiers came except for Quaestor Valdemar. Consul Valerius and other members of the Countess' court pleaded him guilty and almost everything went to your favor. The Countess, too, would accept even the false result because she understood and believed in your plan. As for Portia, she was trying her best to keep her worry to herself. Losing a sibling would be very hard for anyone, and you reassured her after the trial too. The crowd believed in the Countess' final decision and the trial came to an end without any problem. Finally, after Julian was pleaded guilty and hung to death, you waited along with Asra, Portia and Nadia, hoping that magic would save him and the plague would finally be gone for good.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, the doctor was finally hung! Will he survive, will he not? I guess you know the answer already if you have read in the game beforehand, but I hope you still enjoyed it!^^ The next chapter will have a lot more non-canon things btw.


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